The Cheap Labor Conservative who cried wolf

Once upon a time there was a Cheap Labor Conservative who made his living as a pundit on behalf of large corporations and wealthy elites.

He became famous for coining the acronym W.O.L.F. (Wicked Or Liberal Freeloaders), whom he blamed for a host of social evils - such as low church attendance, marijuana use, or, anything that cost his employers money.

"Beware the WOLFs," he would warn his radio and television audiences. "They have a crazy idea that all citizens should be paid fairly - even the ones who didn't have the opportunity to go to college!"

"If WOLFs force defenseless corporations to pay their employees what they need to survive, then the entire economy will collapse!"

For a long time people believed what the Cheap Labor Conservative told them and were too scared to demand what they deserved.  Corporations took advantage of this fear and lowered wages, forcing poor families to squeak by while the executive class reaped huge profits.

Eventually the situation got so bad that a group of workers formed a union in order to control the conditions of their labor.

"Wolf! Wolf!" screamed the Cheap Labor Conservative. "Those uppity union organizers are anarchists and communists!  If you force businesses to negotiate with unions they will go bankrupt, and hard work will never be rewarded again!"

After a long and difficult strike, the workers managed to negotiate for enough pay so they could pull themselves out of poverty.  The companies grumbled at first; but then noticed that productivity went up.

Seeing how unions who obtained a fair wage did not lead to economic collapse, voters decided that everyone should be rewarded for working; so they began to push their political leaders for a minimum wage.

"Wolf! Wolf!" frothed the Cheap Labor Conservative. "A minimum wage will destroy small businesses and reward laziness!"

"Besides," he'd add snidely, "you wouldn't want someone from a lower class to get paid the same as you, would you?  If a poor person at the box store got paid more, that would diminish your own status in society."

Despite the predictions of immanent doom from the pundit, eventually the voters were able to pass a minimum wage law.

Almost immediately local shops noticed an increase in sales because people now had more money to spend.

As an added bonus, since people did not need to depend on social services as much when they are able to earn what they needed from working, the taxes went down.

Rather than encouraging laziness, the minimum wage rewarded those who worked hard. Families were able to save, build credit and create a future for themselves.

The minimum wage was raised many times without a single economic crisis, and several states passed wage laws that were higher than the nationally mandated one.

Minimum wages were so successful, that citizens began talking about "living wages."

"Wolf! Wolf!" whined the Cheap Labor Conservative. "A living-wage law will gut the economy!  Hyper-inflation will ruin everyone's savings accounts and bring disaster to us all!"

At this point, no one believed the Cheap Labor Conservative anymore.  People understood that hyper-inflation was created by resource scarcity, printing too much money, natural disaster or war.  There was not a single economy or community on the planet that has ever suffered an economic crisis due to a living wage.

Since the pundit lost all credibility, he lost his audience and quickly blew all his money on pain killers and alcohol.

Thankfully for the Cheap Labor Conservative, once he hit bottom and was ready to pull himself together - he found a job that paid him enough to get by due to the same living-wage law he fought so hard against.

The end.

Read counterpoint here.

Tags: cheap labor - conservative - Unions - labor - business - living wage - minimum wage - wolf - economics

Credits: Special thanks to the blog The Talent Show for the inspiration behind this post.

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