Slate Magazine reports wildlife biologists have been having trouble getting public attention to the plight of a nearly extinct type of lemur called an "Aye Aye". (Daubentonia madagascariensis)

You see, it's easy to get people to sympathize with cute photogenic animals, like tigers, red pandas or Scarlet Johanson.

But the Aye Aye... well... let me put it this way: If you met one and stomped on it with a heavy boot - it would probably improve it's physical characteristics.

It's so scary-looking, the natives of Madagascar consider the Aye-Aye a symbol of death.

Poor little guy.

It's bad enough that another species is about to get rubbed off the earth like a stray pencil mark on an S-A-T test; but to have trouble getting public sympathy about it because the animal happens to look like a wad of chewing-gum with eyeballs... that's just plain unfair.

Since I'm all about helping the underdog - err... underlemur - I've come up with two solutions to help the Aye Aye with it's image problems:

SUGGESTION ONE: Give the Aye Aye a fashion makeover.

GreenPeace should send an elite force of gay fashion consultants into the jungles of Madagascar with a camera-crew in tow.

They could call it: "Queer Eye for the Aye Aye!"

If the gross little lemurs could given gym memberships, some decent jewelry, and taught how to accessorize - it would go a long way toward making them more self confident, and thus more attractive.

To see what is possible, here is some PhotoShop:

You see? It would work!

SUGGESTION TWO: Get ugly celebrities to hang out with the Aye Aye.

Ugly celebrities have a social responsibility to help fellow unattractive beings who are struggling against a system that discriminates against them.

To paraphrase Pastor Martin Niemoller: "First they came for the Aye Aye, but I did nothing because I wasn't that ugly. Then they came for me... and there was no one left to protest."

It should not be difficult to get a few ugly entertainers, such as Lyle Lovett or Steve Buscemi, to do a few photo-ops and Public Service Announcements with the Aye Aye.

Not only would star-power focus media attention on the needs of the ungainly little creature, ugly celebrities would also make them look more attractive by comparison.

I mean, next to Lyle Lovett, the Aye Aye is Venus incarnate.

I'm sure if I wasn't drunk right now, I could think of several other great ideas to save Daubentonia madagascariensis from extinction. But the point is, activists need to think of fresh ideas to save weird-looking animals from extinction.

Won't you please help?

Read counterpoint here.

Tags: Aye Aye - Daubentonia madagascariensis - Scarlet Johanson - Endangered animals